I’M NOT MY BODY

Michelangelo said: “I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free.”

“I hate the way I look! I hate my hair, my nose, my stupid eyebrows! I hate everything!” Those are the messages I get from my followers.

How to get another look? Talking about a body feels like, talking about the person inhabiting that body. Young people mostly (but not only) are therefore interested in my advice to find the ways of getting thinner, sexier, more muscular in the belief that, if only they could perfect their bodies, they’d be able to perfect their lives. When I respond to a young person, “You’re fine as you are! Everyone will love you for who you are, not what you look like! It’s your personality that matters!”, trying to be helpful but my helpfulness usually falls on deaf ears. “Yes,” thinks ( and sometimes says) that person, “that’s all very well for you to say: you’re not the one who looks like this!”

It makes me always smile when some 20 years old person refers to me in that way, as I’m grandmother at age of 50. It seems more girls than ever feel the need to be perfect – at a time when the mental health of young women is a growing concern. The desire to be perfect, seems to influence thinking from a young age:

I’ve recently found research by Girlguiding UK found that a quarter of seven- to 10-year-old girls felt the need to be perfect. For a lot of young women who contacted me, body image was a huge preoccupation and many said they felt undervalued unless they met society’s expectations of beauty.

I feel a huge responsibility in a way, as my social media also, I’ve understood, plays a big role in influencing women’s outlook on this issue.

Let’s talk about who we are at first

Am I my body? Science says that at every moment, millions of cells of our body are changing and renewing, so that after seven years, there is almost no living cell in the body from those we had before. The cells come and go, they are born and die, but “I” is left. Is it, then, my body? Obviously not! If majority of atoms in our body are periodically replaced, who are we if not our atoms and we are not our cells? So many of us struggle to look younger on the outside. Are we misguided? But more on this subject next time..

The biological markers of aging are things like blood pressure, bone density, cardiovascular conditioning, and the wrinkles you have. Psychological age is your attitude to life. If you have a youthful mind, then your biological markers will reflect that, including your looks. Outer beauty—say, how fresh your skin is, how many wrinkles you have, do you look old or young—reflects what’s happening inside.

Real self-esteem means to be independent of others’ opinions. Not to see yourself as superior or inferior to anyone, and to have no fear of approval or disapproval. Or rejection. If your self-esteem is based on a social mask or plastic surgery, it’s not real. It’s at the whim and mercy of every stranger on the street or on the social platform. Sometimes it’s our biggest failures that teach us the most valuable lessons and letting things fall apart isn’t the end of the world – it’s a chance to rebuild it.

Plastic surgery and cosmetic procedures offer people the option to reshape body parts that they are unhappy with, uncomfortable with and feel are unattractive. There are both cosmetic reasons that people choose to undergo plastic surgery and reconstructive reasons. Once, Anatomy was considered as destiny. Today, plastic surgery can influence that destiny positively, to boost self-esteem and self-image.

The world can be quick to judge, but altering one’s appearance comes in many forms, from false eyelashes to makeup, piercings, and fake nails. If someone’s self-image and self-esteem is boosted and their confidence improved, then it is a worthy undertaking.

As I’ve already mentioned it, in my previous blog/ post, prevention is much easier than turning the hands of time, and there are many simple habits that I’ve adopted to help keep my face and body looking soft and supple. This includes lifestyle, fitness is a non-negotiable priority, practicing good skincare, and after I’ve reached 35 I’ve considerate some medical treatments.

While I agree with many of the concerns people have, about the pressure on women to look younger, I also think it’s perfectly natural to want to look as youthful as you feel inside. There’s nothing wrong with not wanting to seem knackered when you are, in fact, full of energy. I see no problem with seeking to restore the natural glow of your 20s, even if that means exploiting a good skincare, treatments and makeup. It is perfectly reasonable to want your brows to stay where they were, and not gatecrashing your eyelids. Those who say Botox looks weird are talking about bad Botox, the kind you know is there. Administered correctly and in moderation, it can be fantastic and undetectable.

And I’m loving it.

Cosmetic treatment one and only I do:

-Forehead Botox treatment

It is the first cosmetic treatment I started at age of 35. Before the aging process started to create the strong wrinkles. Botox, by working on the right muscles prevented creating these lines and even 50 today, my forehead is still “line free”. Don’t confuse Botox Cosmetic with injectable fillers. Dermal fillers work differently, plumping up tissues so that lines and wrinkles diminish or disappear. For the record, I am opposed to the many things women do to their faces in the name of youth. Collagen doesn’t make you look younger, just puffy. Regardless of who’s injecting it.

But, Botox gave me a smooth forehead that I’m satisfied with. I do it twice a year.

Plastic surgery procedures I’ve undergone:

– Breast lift, also known as Mastopexy

I had a small pair of my own breast that was just fine. They didn’t get in the way, didn’t get me any unwanted attention, and there was enough there that I wasn’t pancake flat. I was perfectly content. Than I got pregnant with my first baby. One of the first changes I noticed, along with general nausea, was my swelling chest. Suddenly, I was actually filling out a bra properly. I felt feminine and I really liked the balance that a bigger chest gave my figure.

I had my first serious case of engorgement in the first few days after delivery. I remember standing in the shower, as I tried to raise my arms to shampoo my hair and feeling pretty much horrified by these swollen, rock-hard boulders. It just didn’t felt like my body anymore. I remember thinking, this is why I’d never, ever get a breast augmentation (boob job).

After second child and breast feeding again for year long, back to my normal exercise routine I’ve noticed that not only my breast were sadly deflated, but due to the loss of fatty tissue, they were saggy too. I waited 12 years hoping that there will be some other ways to get back my breast shape, until I was 36, when finally I accepted a Breast lift, also known as Mastopexy, as a only solution to my problems. It is a procedure that removes the excess, sagging breast skin. This procedure has the goal of raising the breast tissue and nipple to a more attractive, youthful, and “uplifted” state. It also helps the breasts to feel more supple, similar to the pre-pregnant pre- breastfeeding state. I felt reborn and myself again.

– Rhinoplasty, I’ve undergone just a few years ago (commonly known as a nose job) is a plastic surgery procedure for correcting and reconstructing the form of my nose.

I’m more than happy with the results.

Not recommending:

-Lip augmentation with autologous fat grafting

During my preparation for the procedure of mastopexy I was informed about new technic of Lip augmentation with your own fat. I liked the idea. Was so enthusiastic that I’ve done it too. Unfortunately I was not happy with the results and removed it with very painful surgery after some years.

I am 1.82 cm tall but everything else you see, except that birth given fact, is product of hard work. Inside out.

Back to EXERCISE

EXERCISE, EXERCISE, EXERCISE…

Exercise increases blood flow and that keeps all your tissues healthy. I am also convinced the extra blood flow to my scalp makes my hair grow faster. 🙂

Human bodies, as me concerning, are just containers designed to carry souls. … I see my body/vehicle as a car /way of transport / of the spirit through this life journey…..It’s a never ending battle of making your cars better and also trying to be better yourself 🙂

In a world where waving a wallet becomes an erotic act and gluteus has become the target of a control ….and at the same time, greatest interest of contemporary culture..Take better care of yourself, give yourself attention. Real beauty is in the soul. Beauty is more than just external appearance.

Love you all and you know it ❤️ Stay happy 💋

Published by

Realfashionist

Realfashionist is a piece of my heart and soul, that inspires me from daring elegance to smooth classics …from clothes to accessories that allow me to say who I am without saying a word. Building your own style, that doesn’t follow any rules, but simply expresses how you feel at that moment… shows who you are, what you dream of, long for, and sometimes the little desires you have. If you trace a line between 100 years old fashion photos and mine, you’ll see the common theme - lifestyle & character. If a musician dreams in sounds, I capture my imagination through fabrics, colors and style. It does not represent my mental state, but rather the emotions of the moment. Emotions that I express with strength & feminine force.

6 thoughts on “I’M NOT MY BODY

    1. A lot of the conflicts we have in our life exists simply because we’re not living in alignment; we’re not being true to ourself. I try to be honest with myself on the first place. Thanks a lot my dear for appreciating it 🙏🏼

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  1. Užitak Vas je čitati. Sve je tako jednostavno i istinito, a opet duboko. Treba imati hrabrosti i svoj život, razmišljanja i dušu otvoriti na ovakav način. Želim Vam uspjeh i da postove objedinite u nekoj knjizi u budućnosti.

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  2. You are my hero! Greetings from South Florida.
    I read and follow your IG and blog with devotion and zeal, thank you for being authentic and honest. You inspire me! Words cannot describe my admiration, it goes beyond the physical, I love that you speak and refer to things outside fashion, you are REAL and I value that.

    Like

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